MauLer’s review of & My Thoughts on Captain Marvel

Yeah. Sounds like I made the right choice in skipping this mess. Just watching this makes me think some thinky-thoughts about how I think they should have made it. Note that this is pretty much all stream-of-consciousness and would obviously need some more in depth thinkage about various plot points.

  1. First. Recast. Brie Larson is flat-out wrong for this character. Carol should actually come across as tough, not … this. Katee Sackhoff would have been 100% better.
  2. Do NOT set this in the 90s. She should never meet any of the characters back then, particularly Fury. So they couldn’t screw up his awesomeness.
  3. Begin in media res during Thor: The Dark World. Carol and Monica Rambeau are Air Force pilots who are responding to the insane portal stuff that is going on. They are sent tumbling through different portals and Carol crashes…
  4. She wakes somewhere else and discovers that Mahr-Vehl has saved her life. He reveals that they had to make some bio-enhancements to her to ensure that she survived, so she is faster, stronger and tougher than she was before. As this is a post-Avengers setting, she should make a comment about them turning her into Captain America … which they do not get. Mahr-Vehl acknowledges that they had to ensure she was not one of their ancient enemy…
  5. Mahr-Vehl is an older character – I’m thinking mid-50s to early-60s – but in tremendously awesome shape. He knows of Carol’s species because of certain Kree experiments in the past, a clear reference to Inhumans. Eventually, it will be revealed that Mahr-Vehl has been effectively exiled to this world to stand as a sentry or protector or defender – Carol could inject “Avenger?” during this as a reminder that they’re running around at the moment.
  6. Eventually, Carol should be well enough to want to go home, but Mahr-Vehl will reveal that she is stuck here. There is no way off this world because it is “outside reality” (or something like that) and is used to watch for a great and terrible destroyer of worlds that left this galaxy long ago but could always return. The powers that Mahr-Vehl has at his disposal should let him stand against this entity, though they have never been wholly tested and that’s just a theory.
  7. Skrulls attack the Kree community and many are lost. Carol witnesses firsthand the level of power that Mahr-Vehl has at his disposal, but then also sees the toll it takes on him. He reveals that the power he has comes at a cost – it is tearing him apart from the inside (cancer callback to the original Mar-Vell’s death) and the Nega-Bands (rename?) he wears helps him keep this cancer at bay. But one day, it will kill him, leaving the Kree scientists on this world defenseless … unless he can find a proper successor. (Obviously, he’s talking about Carol and she should be smart enough to know this fact.)
  8. Training montage as Carol learns about becoming Mahr-Vehl’s replacement, along with hints by various scientists to her that her human side should prevent the same fate from affecting her … although this will eventually be revealed to be a lie. Also during this, Carol should start noting things that indicate the other Kree (not Mahr-Vehl) are lying to her about stuff. None of them buy this whole destroyer of worlds thing; they’re here to study Mahr-Vehl’s abilities and try to harvest them when he dies. And he’s here because he offended the Supreme Intelligence by not being a mindless drone but rather being a truly honorable dude.
  9. Eventually, Carol discovers that her close friend, Monica, also survived the portal trip but appeared in a different part of the galaxy where she was taken by other Kree … who are experimenting on her! Also, Carol should learn that there is a way to escape this world … but the Skrull have it. So she tries to defect to them…
  10. Mahr-Vehl is given instructions by the Supreme Intelligence to capture/kill her for … reasons, and he swears to do so without actually swearing to do so. Exact words and all. Something like ‘I’ll stop her or die in the process’ with his actual intent being ‘die in the process’ because his arguments with Carol have reminded him of who he was before he was exiled here.
  11. Surprise reveal: the Skrull are as big of scum as the Kree and they use Carol as bait to capture Mahr-Vehl, then blast him with some doo-hickey that mostly strips him of his powers. He and Carol must now fight side-by-side against a “super” Skrull (to establish the precedent should future MCU Fantastic Four want to use this.) In the process, Mahr-Vehl actively sacrifices himself to save Carol, thus ensuring that she is the receptacle of the his abilities … and this should be hideously painful for her, revealing the need for the nega-bands.
  12. Carol kicks some butt (but clearly doesn’t fully know how to use her abilities). She wins clear of the Skrull … then is promptly attacked by the fricking Kree! Both sides kind of suck. She escapes the planet (should be narrowly) and finds herself in space … this part is problematic, I think. Maybe makes more sense for there to be some sort of pseudo-Stargate thing that she can power up with her abilities that takes her to the Kree homeworld? Even then, she’s going to be surrounded on all sides by enemies so … maybe have Mahr-Vehl have provided her with coordinates to Nova Prime …
  13. Oh. Yeah. She needs to arrive at Nova Prime after Thanos has attacked (pre-Infinity War). And then she needs to learn that he’s going after Earth (maybe through John C. Reilly’s character from Guardians of the Galaxy?) That would be a decent ending to the flick, I think.

And then, the stinger. Back on the planet Carol just escaped, one of the Named Kree who survived is picking through the wreckage when an alarm begins sounding. S/He reacts and looks up in horror; to another Kree, she reveals … its coming. The devourer of worlds is coming! (Guess who the big bad of phase 4 to 5 is?)

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