Mon. Mar 27th, 2023

I’ve made no secret how much I freaking hate this time of year, especially X-Mas. My dad died around X-Mas back in ’91 so I have certain sense memories tied to this time of the year. As a result, the closer we get to that point, the more … unbalanced (for lack of a better word) I find myself getting. Today and yesterday are especially good examples: out of nowhere, my mood has sharply deteriorated to the point that I came home from work and just immediately secluded myself in my bedroom where I did some reading and tried to focus on things that wouldn’t piss me off. Unfortunately, the book I’m reading – Kurt Schlichter’s Collapse – probably isn’t helping because I can totally see this being the future of the US. My roommate has invited me to accompany him to his family’s Turkey Day thing tomorrow and I’m still debating whether to go or not. On one hand, I do like his family and he’s basically my “brother from a different mother” but on the other, I’ll have to deal with observing family stuff and God, I’m in no mood to deal with that.

New Year’s cannot possibly come soon enough so I can get back to avoiding introspection.